Fuck today...seriously fuck it...

after i did my Elearning, i faster go chiong to bukit batok meet DFFP...reach there alr still okay u noe..then after that go jeremy's condo..fuck...we swim,go top floor all, then after that i got a fucking fever and i felt like fucking vommiting..i still nvm de..they ask me whether want to send me home i say nvm..i buy the panadol and strepsils then nearly all my money left gone..after that go up arcrade i alr feeling like fuck alr, then i needed to vomit! kenneth & hengkeat bring me go toilet then i vomit damn badly..as in really fucking badly..up till a point where i couldn't vomit anything else...after that i alr feeling like fuck..theen got some nabeicheebai prankcall..i fuck it just give kenneth scold..i couldn't be bothered..then they ask me take cab home then kenneth lend me money all..i knew i didn't have enough but nvm..cause i alr couldn' t move ler.. so otw home i called home ask fr 10 dollars pay for the cab.. then suay my fucking father picked up the phone..then scold scold all nvm... come home all shout at me..i'm think like, what the fuck? so are you scolding me fr being sick at the wrong time or for WASTING your 10 dollars? fuck man i was fucking sick noe?!?!! u tink i want to meh? so paiseh borrow from my friend... think la..then u come tell me "who ask u go all the way there?!"..correct! thats my problem, so why are you scolding me? i expected you to be concern and all but FUCK NO! the whole week the whole world has been judging me,jumping to conclusions and now y'all are doing that.. fuck you man! F-U-C-K Y-O-U! i dun need pp like you in my fucking life..dun ever tell me to bond with the family.. the fact is i'm nt even considered family..if my brothers can take out mone for me to see me home safe.. what more you show more concern?

on another topic..the whole week i've been down with fever and tonsillitis...and like..idk lah..when ur stuck at home, suddenly u just think abt many things that you haven't thought abt b4..and like..i realised that ppl in my cell, well they always tell u they wanna talk to u and they're nt gonna scold u,but the conversation ends off with a scolding..which then leads to an argument...i mean can u blame me? i never did shit in church and like..i'm a total stranger man..i really dunno what to do la..but i've decided I'm just gonna fuck care life and every little thing concerning it...

P.S; thanks kenneth and hengkeat, i was honestly very touched by yall today! i couldn't imagine anyone else doin that for me..you guys are really family..DFFP is really my family..i'll always be grateful to ya'll for everything u've done for me and will always love DFFP!

Ytd was a pretty much okay day for me uh.. after school went home then on the bus i saw michael they all, then decided to go home bathe and meet them. we lepak awhile then after that Marcus ralph and I went toralph's house but then his door was locked -.- so nvm uh walked back to Mrt.. then went to penin walk around all.. then becoz ralph met his friend, me and marcus go walk walk lo... then after that met my zone, peh han came talk to me, ask alot of stuffs,then we all went to burger king lo... after that got hao xiong to follow me go buy friend mars bars and then went for service lorh/

service was really good.. but somehow i just couldn't present my self to god.. i felt so guilty... i wat to change.. but everytimei change, i'll always end up the same....

so after service went to tampines 450 eat dinner,then shared a cab home with sandra lorh...

yup.. then got home sleep like free,then now waiting to go for reunion dinner!

BYE!

P.s:

u say ppl are hypocrites becoz they tell you not to do it but they still do it.. but how abt ourself? you told me many stuffs in the past but arn't you still doin it now? i noe we arn't that close anymore.. but i still care abt you as my brother... you were so on fire for God.. that made me wanna be on fire to... but its so har to imagine you falling back to your old self... I must admit that I ain't any better.. but at least I'm tryingg... I feel the guilt man.. I can't even praise God the same becoz of this guilt... wake up kent... you think thats bad? they used to stop me from talking to the girl I still like up till now.. but dey have their reasons... if you would just tal to them and ask them why? I'm sure you'll understand... c'mon.. If someone like me can understand that, I don't see why you can't...

ytd was a super awesome day for me!

ytd met vergil at eunos first then went to meet kenneth at outram are there! LOL then we 3 went to meet gabriel and sean at vivo there lorh.. haha so kenneth vergil and gabriel went to buy something  so me and sean went t eat first! haha then after that went to vivo play lorh! we super bo liao uh.. super sia suay also cause we all wearing slippers right(expect for vergil) so we all go the water area at vivo outside go walk in the water with our slippers! haha had gr8 fun la!

then we all coled down after a while..then we serious liao..called preno up and told him lah...his reactions was like "orh".. i mean.. its damn wtf lah! so like it was damn obvious to DFFP that he didn't give a shit lah.. so whatever lorh... we just dun care abt him alr..

then we all went to kovan the petrol station buy food like free liddat! then we carry our stuffs all the way to the richard avenue playground! we really lepak sua sia! haha we just sit there.. draw here and there.. like till 6 plus! haha then gabriel had to go liao.. so we all walkd back to serangoon there lepak again! we talk alot of cock la! haha had some laughs then sean also had to go home liao.. so it was around like 7.20 then we really nothing to do liao! then kenneth needed to pee..then i andergil also.. so .... HAHAHA we all go some nearby block pee there! damn funny lah can! haa then after that went to some benches and just joke around ad all..

but then suddenly.. i felt god talking to me... cause like.. we were talking about christmas and all.. then kenneth was talking about hw his family nv celebrated christmas and hw much he wanted that experience! and slowly the topic change to his family problems.. i won't say it here but.. we both could really relate to each other cause i also had this problems.. i mean.. then god kept on bugging me! "talk to him abt me.." but i told god "cannot lah.." but then i felt something in me boiling.. i had to tell him! so i just blurted out abt christ dying for us and all.. and then i asked him as we we got up and walked "can i pray for you?" he was ok with it lah so i prayed for him and i really felt sense of relieve lorh....

yup..but today uh.. feeling alittle bit bored and anxious at the same time.. idk why.. maybe its emptiness or soemthing.. but i think its definately cause i miss her.. but oh well.. all part of god's plan and timing..